Aidan

I am completely in love with my great nephew Aidan!! He is th weirdest kid I have ever known, hahahaha. He enjoys the simplest things, and doesn't really need much correction!! He is 3 years old, him and I share a birthdate, a bond, a special name, he is my heart!! He reminds me of my Ashley when she was little, she was easy to be around too!!!

Sometimes we don't agree...

My daughter and I have been in a pissing contest for the last few weeks...  I think her BF is a moron..  Like not just immature, but, just not very smart..  I know what my girl has told me she wants outta her adult life...  She wants 2 kids, she want a LARGE house, she wants a cool car, she wants stairs in her house..  She wants a green lawn that is manicured and beautiful..  She wants a husband that is helpful and nice to her...  I think all these things are fantastic!!  Here is my problem....  When you want all of those things in your adult life, you have to shop for your mate with all of that in mind!!  Meaning, that more than his personality matters.....  There is a perfect man out there for her that has what it takes to fill all of those things for her...  Now she doesn't want her man to provide all, she is goin to college and wants to get a RN and eventually be a Nurse Practitioner..  Very good career choice, and completely doable for my very bright girl!!! Problem, if she settles for someone that is just nice and doesn't consider all the other attributes that will make him what he will be in the future, she could fall very short of what she wants....  Why would she do that?!?!!?!? My other issue..  If you see that there is no future, why would you continue the relationship like there is ..  Me, being a logically thinking person, finds it absolutely ridiculous to have a relationship that you already know how it is goin to end, badly for one or the other...  Why continue to let feelings build if they are never goin anywhere????  I don't get that???  So, she tells me to shut me up that he is her right now...  Well, my issue with that is, he thinks they are getting married one day....  Why would the girl that I have raised better than that, lead him on..  I don't find that to be very fair, even though I really don't like the kid, it is not right to do that to him....  So we are at an inpass.....  I don't know what the answer is...  I am giving this one to God, he knows better than me, what is right for her!  I am believing God will rectify this situation and hopefully the lesson she learns won't be too hard to swallow!!!  Sometimes he corrects things in a harsh way to make a point!

Piano???

I work from home, some days I am SUPER BUSY, other days, not so much.. I am constantly looking for ways to fill my free time that are creative, like writing in a blog.. I have done oil painting, tried to play the bass guitar, gardening, raising livestock, ect..... So after talking with Mike last night about what I could try next, we decide on piano!!! Can a 40 yr old learn how to play piano???? Having only a small amount of musical experience, I mean, I played clarinet In the school band in 7th grade, I played bass guitar last year... So.... I will try to take some lessons!!!

Really Eve!!

Can I just say that as a woman. It really irritates me, that Eve, the very first woman... Couldn't keep it together... Everytime, I start, with the cramps and the bloating, and the emotions and the backache!!! I think really Eve!?!?!? I have you to thank for this.. Really?!?!? What were you thinking?!?!? Ugh!!

Don't you hate???

Don't you hate it when you find out that someone is not the way you thought they were????  I am a firm believer that actions speak louder than words..  Behavior doesn't lie, mouths do!!!  You can tell me one thing and show me something else, and I am gonna believe the show me every time!!  I find myself to be a pretty good judge of character, and man, when I find out I am wrong....  It REALLY pisses me off!!!!

See in the light..

Mike and I have been in a funky place the last few years, 5, to exact.. 5 years ago We took a chance and started his own handyman service, well.... The first year, was awesome!!! We were making money, things were good, seemed like we had made the right decision, him quitting his county job and goin with this.... I was self employed and so was he, life was good...... Then..... The economy tanked, gas shot up to $3 a gallon, women stopped getting their hair done as often, some where even doin it themselves, people quit renovating, or decided to do it themselves, I found myself outta a 70hr a week job to now about a 30 hr a week job, mike found himself with NO job....... Man it was tough.... For about two years, he would take jobs when he could get them, and the rest of the time we just struggled, NO ONE WAS HIRING!!! At this time we have had to make some serious lifestyle changes!!!!! Then we got a break, we got a steady job at a local car dealership, it was awesome, for a minute!!! They wouldn't give him the money he deserved for the work he was doin and we were again barely making ends meet, and we're still 2 months on all our bills!!! Ugh!!! So, he went to his boss and told him that he needed more money, his boss said, too bad, so, he quit!!! He was certain he would find another job quickly....... Well he didn't!!!! That was in April, well it is October and my husband is FINELY back to work in a decent job!!!! Praise God!!! What is amazing to me, as well as a testimony to the Goodness of God, is that we never got any further behind than we were....... He has been working side jobs and stuff since April, bringing money in sparaticaly, but not steady, my money is not steady, we have been living on love and roses!! I think I see the light at the end of our personal tunnel!! I am so thankful to God for keeping his promise to keep us from harm!!!!!!!

The early years...

I was a bad kid...  I had parents that seemed to be too caught up in what was goin on with them to see what was goin on with me... I don't blame them for my behavior, but they sure didn't do anything to stop it!!  I started smoking when I was 10, I was drinking by 12, smoking pot by 14, first line of cocaine, 17...  Many drugs to follow.......  I would mix drugs and alcohol, I stayed out all night..  I PARTIED like a Rock Star, in a small town in FL!!   It is absolutely a blessing from God that I didn't die or have anything horrific happen to me....My parents were married until I was 19..  Daddy moved out and it was me and Mom and my sister...  It wasn't long before I moved in with Daddy and my brother, Paul.   The day I moved in, My Dad told me, he wasn't gonna put up with my freeloading ways and if I wanted to live with him, I was gonna have to work and pay 1/3 of the bills!!  In other words "TIME TO GROW UP"  well!!  So, I got a job at the Russell Corporation and went to work!!!  I was really good at it!!  Apparently I have awesome dexterity!!  Who knew????  I sewed sweat shirts..  I mastered the first operation they gave me and in no time I was moving all over, doin all the jobs to make the shirts!!  They played music so I would sing and sew all day...  Come home covered in multiple colored dust!!   Life was good, Daddy and I lived together for a little over a year, he got a GF that I hated so I started looking for a place to live, and a roommate...  I found a trailer, dirt cheap and 3 bedroom..  I had never lived in a trailer, but I knew I didn't want an apartment and I couldn't afford a house.... So, trailer it was....  I found this girl that I worked with, she seemed cool, so I let her move in with me...  I moved in next to these 4 guys....  James..  One of the biggest POT growers in our county, he thought I was cute!!!  Jerry, this little slouched back looked like an old man at 24 guy, that I found very gross...  Dean( we called him Joe, idk why??) and Robert... Now Robert was different than the others, in that I didn't find him completely repulsive..  He was funny and different than anyone I had met, best part, he LIKED me!!!  Now by the time I had met Robert, I was a hard working HOT MESS!!  I worked harder than anyone I knew, but I partied just that hard...  The boys in the trailer next to me were garbage men..  Hahahahahahahah!!  I had never met a garbage man before, I was raised very middle class...  No trailers, NO garbage men!!!  Back in those days, I worked all day and partied all night...  When I wasn't partying, I was still hanging out...  We played poker on Fridays night, Seville on Saturday, Ren & Stimpy on Sunday, 90210 on Monday.......  There was somebody there all the time...  Either the boys next door or some of the other 7 or 8 people I hung out with , at this time..  It was Me and Cindy, we were the two girls in the group...  Prob because we thought more like them than reg girls like Michelle(my roommate) when I look back at these years of my life, I think, OMG it is just amazing that I didn't hit someone, cause I drove DRUNK, that I didn't OD, that I didn't get raped...  God ABSOLUTELY  protected me while I was off being the prodigal!!! This went on for about a year......

I am now 21, I decide that all this partying is wearing me out...  So I think, BF!!  That will fix it!!!  I will get a boyfriend and settle down...  Dads GF will quit calling me a whore(which I was not, but she couldn't understand a girl who hung out with all those guys, not sleeping with all of them at the same time, :), maybe Mom would like me again(her and I were estranged at this time, from the blow up that caused my move to daddy's),it would fix all my problems, and I could get some rest!!!!

Enter Robert..  The garbage man next door....  Man, he was a mess too...  But I thought he was cute, so I went out on a date with him...  How romantic, he got us a bottle of Jagermiester and we went and drank it straight sittin on the beach...  No dinner, no movie...  Why did I think that was good enough for a first date????  On our second sate, we went to a Halloween party, at Cindy's house... The only thing I remember about that night is, sitting on his lap at the table drinking, and smoking pot, cause that is what we did...  ALL the time!!!!  In walks a man, now all the people I hung out with were 8-12 yrs older than me, he is FINE, I was mesmerized by him, while I was sittin on Robert's lap..  I had seen this man before..  When I was 16 and he was around 26, he is my Brothers friend Mike, HE IS FINE!!  He had on a leather jacket and jeans, everybody was so happy to see him, he was only in town for the night...  He was like a superstar to these people, I had heard the stories about him, he was almost a legend to me at that time...  Meeting him was like meeting a rockstar, he had been in a band, and had traveled, he was AWESOME!!!   He didn't even notice us, the two kids sitting at the table with all the grown ups, soooooo, my attention turned back to Robert........