Mike

Mike, what can i say about him.....  He is my BFF, my husband, my hero, my carpenter, my plumber, my electrician, my mechanic, and my fishing partner!!!  Our first date was a weekend fishing trip to Lake Seminole Fl with his son, his brother, and his father...  We had a great time..  I thought he was FINE!!   I was 23 and had Ashley who at this time was 14 months old...  I already knew that Robert was gonna deadbeat, cause that is how he rolled, so I was looking for a good father...  I watch Mike with his son Kevin all weekend, how he acted around him, how he treated him, how his family was with him...  I was very satisfied with what I was seeing, and I really liked him, thought he was the coolest guy I have ever met!!!!!!  We decided on that trip to give a relationship a try..  We did..  we jumped in with both feet...  We practically lived together from the first date on..  We just clicked, like nothing I had ever experienced in my life...  That was 1995..  The year after Ashley was born is the year she met her REAL father...  Mike told me about 6 months into our relationship, Ashley needs a Dad and I can be that for her..  I wont leave her, she will be mine, just like Kevin is, even if things don't work out with us, I will still be her Dad!!!!  I loved him even more after he said that!!!!  Who knew 17 years later, we would still be together...  It has not been perfect, but it has been solid!!  

Let me tell you...  He and his family...  Just amazing people, they took me and my girl in and treated us like family from the very beginning...  Well, almost from the beginning.  I had to win Jane over, Ashley had her from the minute Jane set eyes on her, she loved her.  There was a time when Jane was spoiling Ashley so badly, she was getting hard to live with...  I had to tell her to stop, we have to live with her, and she was rotten!!!!  Jane laughed and apologized, she said Ashley was so cute and so special, she just wanted her to have everything she wanted, right when she wanted it....  She did understand my point and rained in her lavishing ways!!  Mr. Jerry loved both of us from the beginning!  What a sweet man he was!  I miss them both terribly, we have lost My Father and both Mike's parents in the last 6 years...  

Cold weather

Brrrr!! Looks like winter is here... The prob with winter in FL... Our humidity level stays up, so what you get is a bone chilling cold that is, believe it or not, colder feeling than a dry cold that is even much colder in temp.... It can be 45 her and you will shiver to the point of hurting!!! It can be painful..

The "Representative"

My friend Pat shared this theory with me and the it hands down the truth.. The "Rep" is the person you meet.. Everyone is on their best behavior when they first enter your life, in a love relationship it is REALLY true.... The "Rep" say and does all the right things says all the right things.. Well in time people get comfy with each other and the "real deal" show up.. The "RD" is the person who is left... If you have found someone to be a keeper in your life their "RD" is close to the "Rep". Sometimes the two are vastly different!!! Sometimes the "Rep" leaves and a total stranger is left behind.. That was the case in my first marriage, I call it "flipping the switch".. They are just different one day, usually after a stressor.. My second marriage, with the exception that he does not do dishes, he is the Same person I met.. I think I am too... When someone changes like that, bail!!! The "Rep" is never coming back.. You will get stuck in a cycle of "you need to change" and them only doin short term changes to hook you again, and then back to the "RD".

AHHHHH!! Sunday Again!!

Oh Sunday how I love you!!!  This is my fave day of the week..  I get to go to church and Worship, one of my fav things to do..  I need it especially bad today...  We were out of town last week, so I missed, but a dear friend brought me the CD, so i am caught up..  But, I missed the Worship..  The connection I make with the music is unreal, it really softens my heart and prepares it to hear the Word!!  Today I get the full effect, maybe I will stay for the second music set too.. I stay when Mike is playing his guitar...  But today, he is sleeping...  Worked a 12 hour shift over night last night..  Gotta go!!

The good and the bad! Always come together!!

I haven't written in a while...  I haven't really had much to say...  I have been in a bit of a funk...  We have had some amazingly good things happen around our house, and some amazingly stressful stuff happening around here too!!

 We will start with the good...  After 5 years, Mike has gotten hired with a Jail as a deputy again..  He worked in this field before, decided to open his own handyman business(which did not work out in the economy) and has finally gotten back in with detention...  It is not a fun job, but the pay is good and the benefits are awesome..

Now the stressful...  My girl has been having a little rebellion..  In the scope of what a teen can pull its mild, but because of who my girl normally is, its bad!!!  I am just at my wits end with the whole thing!!!    I don't want to do much bashing on here, this is not really the place for that, for me...  But I will say....  I am over it!!

one sided relationships, outta balance!!

It is my personal opinion that a lasting relationship should have balance....  To me a relationship should look like a mixture of both of the individuals, not weighing heavy to one side or the other...  I feel like my husband and I have a good balance of each of our likes, and even some things we both like...  When you are in a relationship that is all about one and very little of the other, the little one will get lost.....  Once you loose yourself, it is really hard to find yourself again...  I find that these relationships are mildly toxic, like ingesting a tiny bit of poison that could take years to kill you but you feel bad, and don't know why!!!!!!  For what ever reason, women are the worst, we loose ourselves in the men we are with..  You might find yourself doin things that before made you roll your eyes and gasp in disgust, next thing you know you are spending hours doin the very thing that "pre-guy", you wouldn't have been caught dead doin!!!  Why do women do that????  Wouldn't it be easier and better for you if you found someone who was like you to begin with, instead of trying to fit yourself into a life that you have no business in??????  Evaluate your relationship and ask your self...  Does this look like who I have been for the five years before this person came along???  If the answer is NO, then it is time to find a new person!!!  The real problem is.....  If you want to change who you are, then fantastic, but pretending to be someone you are not, is lying!!!  All lies end badly!!!!

Experimentation is part of my job!!

Today I am experimenting with ombré haircolor!! Not doin the Hollywood typical blonde on brown.. Instead I am doin a red on brown that I think will make my haircut pop!! At least that is what I am hoping for!!!!

If I can't be happy all the time, I wonder is it even possible...

Here's the deal...  I am a stay at home hair dresser..  which means, my friends come to my house to talk with me and get their stuff done...  I don't have to go anywhere, my schedule is COMPLETELY flexible, I don't have to get dressed or even put on makeup...  If  I can't be satisfied in my career, I highly doubt anyone can!!!!    It is rewarding when I help someone, it is challenging, when they want something different, it is engaging when we are talking about tough stuff. oh and I get paid pretty well!!  Why can't I be happy and run out there every day with a huge smile on my face?!?!?!?!?!?!?  Cause I am human, that is why!!!  We are fault finding creatures!!!  Today my prayer is for God to renew my spirit where my Job is concerned!!!  I have the greatest job in the world!!

Aidan

I am completely in love with my great nephew Aidan!! He is th weirdest kid I have ever known, hahahaha. He enjoys the simplest things, and doesn't really need much correction!! He is 3 years old, him and I share a birthdate, a bond, a special name, he is my heart!! He reminds me of my Ashley when she was little, she was easy to be around too!!!

Sometimes we don't agree...

My daughter and I have been in a pissing contest for the last few weeks...  I think her BF is a moron..  Like not just immature, but, just not very smart..  I know what my girl has told me she wants outta her adult life...  She wants 2 kids, she want a LARGE house, she wants a cool car, she wants stairs in her house..  She wants a green lawn that is manicured and beautiful..  She wants a husband that is helpful and nice to her...  I think all these things are fantastic!!  Here is my problem....  When you want all of those things in your adult life, you have to shop for your mate with all of that in mind!!  Meaning, that more than his personality matters.....  There is a perfect man out there for her that has what it takes to fill all of those things for her...  Now she doesn't want her man to provide all, she is goin to college and wants to get a RN and eventually be a Nurse Practitioner..  Very good career choice, and completely doable for my very bright girl!!! Problem, if she settles for someone that is just nice and doesn't consider all the other attributes that will make him what he will be in the future, she could fall very short of what she wants....  Why would she do that?!?!!?!? My other issue..  If you see that there is no future, why would you continue the relationship like there is ..  Me, being a logically thinking person, finds it absolutely ridiculous to have a relationship that you already know how it is goin to end, badly for one or the other...  Why continue to let feelings build if they are never goin anywhere????  I don't get that???  So, she tells me to shut me up that he is her right now...  Well, my issue with that is, he thinks they are getting married one day....  Why would the girl that I have raised better than that, lead him on..  I don't find that to be very fair, even though I really don't like the kid, it is not right to do that to him....  So we are at an inpass.....  I don't know what the answer is...  I am giving this one to God, he knows better than me, what is right for her!  I am believing God will rectify this situation and hopefully the lesson she learns won't be too hard to swallow!!!  Sometimes he corrects things in a harsh way to make a point!

Piano???

I work from home, some days I am SUPER BUSY, other days, not so much.. I am constantly looking for ways to fill my free time that are creative, like writing in a blog.. I have done oil painting, tried to play the bass guitar, gardening, raising livestock, ect..... So after talking with Mike last night about what I could try next, we decide on piano!!! Can a 40 yr old learn how to play piano???? Having only a small amount of musical experience, I mean, I played clarinet In the school band in 7th grade, I played bass guitar last year... So.... I will try to take some lessons!!!

Really Eve!!

Can I just say that as a woman. It really irritates me, that Eve, the very first woman... Couldn't keep it together... Everytime, I start, with the cramps and the bloating, and the emotions and the backache!!! I think really Eve!?!?!? I have you to thank for this.. Really?!?!? What were you thinking?!?!? Ugh!!

Don't you hate???

Don't you hate it when you find out that someone is not the way you thought they were????  I am a firm believer that actions speak louder than words..  Behavior doesn't lie, mouths do!!!  You can tell me one thing and show me something else, and I am gonna believe the show me every time!!  I find myself to be a pretty good judge of character, and man, when I find out I am wrong....  It REALLY pisses me off!!!!

See in the light..

Mike and I have been in a funky place the last few years, 5, to exact.. 5 years ago We took a chance and started his own handyman service, well.... The first year, was awesome!!! We were making money, things were good, seemed like we had made the right decision, him quitting his county job and goin with this.... I was self employed and so was he, life was good...... Then..... The economy tanked, gas shot up to $3 a gallon, women stopped getting their hair done as often, some where even doin it themselves, people quit renovating, or decided to do it themselves, I found myself outta a 70hr a week job to now about a 30 hr a week job, mike found himself with NO job....... Man it was tough.... For about two years, he would take jobs when he could get them, and the rest of the time we just struggled, NO ONE WAS HIRING!!! At this time we have had to make some serious lifestyle changes!!!!! Then we got a break, we got a steady job at a local car dealership, it was awesome, for a minute!!! They wouldn't give him the money he deserved for the work he was doin and we were again barely making ends meet, and we're still 2 months on all our bills!!! Ugh!!! So, he went to his boss and told him that he needed more money, his boss said, too bad, so, he quit!!! He was certain he would find another job quickly....... Well he didn't!!!! That was in April, well it is October and my husband is FINELY back to work in a decent job!!!! Praise God!!! What is amazing to me, as well as a testimony to the Goodness of God, is that we never got any further behind than we were....... He has been working side jobs and stuff since April, bringing money in sparaticaly, but not steady, my money is not steady, we have been living on love and roses!! I think I see the light at the end of our personal tunnel!! I am so thankful to God for keeping his promise to keep us from harm!!!!!!!

The early years...

I was a bad kid...  I had parents that seemed to be too caught up in what was goin on with them to see what was goin on with me... I don't blame them for my behavior, but they sure didn't do anything to stop it!!  I started smoking when I was 10, I was drinking by 12, smoking pot by 14, first line of cocaine, 17...  Many drugs to follow.......  I would mix drugs and alcohol, I stayed out all night..  I PARTIED like a Rock Star, in a small town in FL!!   It is absolutely a blessing from God that I didn't die or have anything horrific happen to me....My parents were married until I was 19..  Daddy moved out and it was me and Mom and my sister...  It wasn't long before I moved in with Daddy and my brother, Paul.   The day I moved in, My Dad told me, he wasn't gonna put up with my freeloading ways and if I wanted to live with him, I was gonna have to work and pay 1/3 of the bills!!  In other words "TIME TO GROW UP"  well!!  So, I got a job at the Russell Corporation and went to work!!!  I was really good at it!!  Apparently I have awesome dexterity!!  Who knew????  I sewed sweat shirts..  I mastered the first operation they gave me and in no time I was moving all over, doin all the jobs to make the shirts!!  They played music so I would sing and sew all day...  Come home covered in multiple colored dust!!   Life was good, Daddy and I lived together for a little over a year, he got a GF that I hated so I started looking for a place to live, and a roommate...  I found a trailer, dirt cheap and 3 bedroom..  I had never lived in a trailer, but I knew I didn't want an apartment and I couldn't afford a house.... So, trailer it was....  I found this girl that I worked with, she seemed cool, so I let her move in with me...  I moved in next to these 4 guys....  James..  One of the biggest POT growers in our county, he thought I was cute!!!  Jerry, this little slouched back looked like an old man at 24 guy, that I found very gross...  Dean( we called him Joe, idk why??) and Robert... Now Robert was different than the others, in that I didn't find him completely repulsive..  He was funny and different than anyone I had met, best part, he LIKED me!!!  Now by the time I had met Robert, I was a hard working HOT MESS!!  I worked harder than anyone I knew, but I partied just that hard...  The boys in the trailer next to me were garbage men..  Hahahahahahahah!!  I had never met a garbage man before, I was raised very middle class...  No trailers, NO garbage men!!!  Back in those days, I worked all day and partied all night...  When I wasn't partying, I was still hanging out...  We played poker on Fridays night, Seville on Saturday, Ren & Stimpy on Sunday, 90210 on Monday.......  There was somebody there all the time...  Either the boys next door or some of the other 7 or 8 people I hung out with , at this time..  It was Me and Cindy, we were the two girls in the group...  Prob because we thought more like them than reg girls like Michelle(my roommate) when I look back at these years of my life, I think, OMG it is just amazing that I didn't hit someone, cause I drove DRUNK, that I didn't OD, that I didn't get raped...  God ABSOLUTELY  protected me while I was off being the prodigal!!! This went on for about a year......

I am now 21, I decide that all this partying is wearing me out...  So I think, BF!!  That will fix it!!!  I will get a boyfriend and settle down...  Dads GF will quit calling me a whore(which I was not, but she couldn't understand a girl who hung out with all those guys, not sleeping with all of them at the same time, :), maybe Mom would like me again(her and I were estranged at this time, from the blow up that caused my move to daddy's),it would fix all my problems, and I could get some rest!!!!

Enter Robert..  The garbage man next door....  Man, he was a mess too...  But I thought he was cute, so I went out on a date with him...  How romantic, he got us a bottle of Jagermiester and we went and drank it straight sittin on the beach...  No dinner, no movie...  Why did I think that was good enough for a first date????  On our second sate, we went to a Halloween party, at Cindy's house... The only thing I remember about that night is, sitting on his lap at the table drinking, and smoking pot, cause that is what we did...  ALL the time!!!!  In walks a man, now all the people I hung out with were 8-12 yrs older than me, he is FINE, I was mesmerized by him, while I was sittin on Robert's lap..  I had seen this man before..  When I was 16 and he was around 26, he is my Brothers friend Mike, HE IS FINE!!  He had on a leather jacket and jeans, everybody was so happy to see him, he was only in town for the night...  He was like a superstar to these people, I had heard the stories about him, he was almost a legend to me at that time...  Meeting him was like meeting a rockstar, he had been in a band, and had traveled, he was AWESOME!!!   He didn't even notice us, the two kids sitting at the table with all the grown ups, soooooo, my attention turned back to Robert........

What I like about Sundays!!

When I say that, I think about that country song "what I like about Sundays"..  I go to a different kinda church but, same principle...  I worked in the nursery today with my friend Missy..  It is a hoot when we get in there together...  She is a great friend of mine and we rock babies and solve all the problems in the world, hahahahahaha!  I do her hail and her nails, so we hang out every other week, I invited her to church about 10 years ago..  I love her and her family dearly!!!!  We only had two babies today, so it was perfect, one for her and one for me!!  Ok, back to what I like about Sundays..  I go to church every week, without fail, prob miss in a year 2-3 and that is with good reason...  My husband, Mike, plays in our amazing Church band.  I love the music...  You are greeted at the front door with a smile, Miss Sharon is always at the coffee table ready to greet you...  Mary and Buddy are hanging around in the atrium, chattin with folks..  We walk in, everyone is so nice and happy to see you..  Make my way through the crowd, the band is still rehearsing, so I catch the last of that(a little extra worship)..  Usually get enough message guides for anyone who might show up..  Say hey to the guys in the sound both, we sit in the same seats every week(like good church folks do).  Paul and Roxanne sit in front of us, Alyssa and Curt, and Polly and Pat sit behind us.  Missy and her girls sit the my right..  I sit on the second row on the left in the second chair, cause the first is for Mike when he comes off the stage...  Ashley and her Boyfriend Zach, my Mom, My sister and her husband Paul, my niece Nicole and her husband Jonathan  with their little man Aidan are all there too!!  It is a family get together every Sunday...  I LOVE IT!!!!  Our Pastor, Ron, is awesome..  He always manages to talk directly to me when he preaches..  Not with vision, but with content!!  It is incredible, and more times than not, me and all my friends will stand around after and its like we all got it, but in different parts...  It is amazing to me how God will use a man to tell me what I need to hear, and the person next to me something completely different when we are in the same room with the same pastor!!!!!!  Mike and I go to the same little diner after and have lunch..  The old waitress Faye is always there to talk about fishing, or just to give you a hard time, cause she is working on Sundays!!  She is a sweet ole smarty pants..  I love her..  They have the same menu "Lunch special" every day, you get the choose one, from the side of the dry erase board with the big writing, and three from the side with the small writing...  Hamburger steak, turnip greens, fried okra, and deviled eggs!  Cooked the way old southern ladies cook...  We come home, Mike ALWAYS takes a nap...  I stalk folks on FB and do things like write in my blog, or balance my check book!!  Sunday is absolutely my fave day of the week!!!

Homecoming 2011

Well my baby is off to homecoming dance at the high school.. She looked so beautiful!! I haven't talked much about hairdressing, but days like today were me out!!! Curl, curl, curl, curl... Pin, pin, pin.. SPRAY!!!!! They all turned out really good!! I also airbrushed the girls face makeup, I like that look, it is very finished looking.... We took the kids to a couple locations around town for pics!! It was a fun outting!! Now we are chillin at the house, me and my fella!!

What I believe!

I am a Christian woman..  Now, I didn't say GOOD Christian woman, cause I really don't think I am!!  A Christian never-the-less..  This Apostle's Creed is my belief in a nutshell!

I BELIEVE in God, the Father almighty,
creator of heaven and earth.

I believe in Jesus Christ, his only Son, our Lord.
He was conceived by the power of the Holy Spirit
and born of the Virgin Mary.

He suffered under Pontius Pilate,
was crucified, died, and was buried.

He descended to the dead.
On the third day he rose again.
He ascended into heaven,
and is seated at the right hand of the Father.
He will come again to judge the living and the dead.

I believe in the Holy Spirit,
the holy Christian Church,
the communion of saints,
the forgiveness of sins,
the resurrection of the body,
and the life everlasting.

Amen.






Now, that being said...  I don't judge others for their beliefs or lack of them..  I feel it is not my place..  I prescribe to a live and let let policy...  I find that in the times we are living in, some people are absolutely closed up when it comes to the things of God..  I find that sad, because ALL GOOD THINGS COME FROM GOD, even if you are not a Christian!!  I know that when I am with someone that doesn't know, or understand, it is better for that person, for me to just simply add into our conversation what I know about that they don't...  I have read the bible(most of it) I know what it says and who said it..  I believe that the Bible is a collection of GOD BREATHED words that are for us, even in 2011, to guide us through life....  I attend a local Church, full of misfits, just like me..  We are not perfect people, and sometimes we fight like a family will, but that is all part of life!  I hate to admit it, but apart from my church, I have a very hard time stayin connected to My God....  Now, do I believe that YOU have to go to church to be a Christian, no I do not!!   But, I believe that for me, it is the only way God stays a major focus in my life, cause I am not good!!!  So, I go EVERY week!!!!!!  Every week, I learn something that I did not know, before I got there!!  I love it, it recharges me and sets my week on a good path!!! I am a sinner and I sin everyday(sorry Lord) that is why apart from God, I am awful and REALLY sinful!!!!  Here are a few of my fav scriptures:


Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)  For I know the plans I have for you, Declares the Lord, Plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.


Proverbs 3:5-6(NIV) Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.  in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.


James 1:2-4(NIV)  Consider it pure joy my friends, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.  Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.


1 Timothy 6:10(NIV)  For the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil.  Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.


John 3:27(NIV) To this John replied, : A person can only receive what is given them from heaven"


Luke 6:38(NIV)  GIVE, and it will be given to you.  A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap.  For the measure you use, it will be measured back to you!!


Ok that is enough for now...  I have about a million outta the bible that I LOVE and try to APPLY to my daily life!!!

Amazing!!

I bought my house from a friend/client of mine..  She is a huge blessing in my life!!  First of all she gave me a no money down mortgage at the goin reg mortgage interest rate 8 1/2 years a go..  3 months ago, she calls me out of the blue and asks if I would like my interest lowered??  Cause we had paid faithfully and she thought we deserved it..  Taking money out of her own pocket.    Well today I texted her, cause I couldn't call without crying...  I can't make my house payment for the first time in 8 1/2 years and she even lowered my payment.  She knows that my husband has been out of work, which is really not her problem, but like I said, she is amazing...  I asked her if I could not make my payment this month and make it up after the first of the year and she said sure....  God must know that after the first of the year is when we will be living on SS and your check....   What a blessing to me this woman is..  I absolutely LOVE the house I bought from her, it is like I have lived here my whole life...  It fits me like a comfy pair of yoga pants!!!!!

Just somethin cool!!

So Mike and I decide to go out to the river today..  We got there and the sky was mostly blue with a little cloud cover...  We put in and get around the corner from the dock to a place we fished about a month or more ago(after church on a Sunday afternoon, when I lost my fav lure on a tin roof).  We tie up to a pylon there, cause Mike forgot the trolling motor, and start to fish....  Low and behold, Mike says 'Hey, there is a lure in the water"...  Jokingly I said "wouldn't it be cool if it was mine"..  IT WAS!!!!!!  The lure that I got hung on that tin roof a month or more ago, was floating in the exact spot that we were fishing!!!  HA!!!  I couldn't believe it!!  Thought it was cool!!!!  If I knew how to post pics on this thing, I would show it to ya!!!

Empty Nesting..

I say empty nesting, but our girl still lives at home..  But between school, and BF, and BFF, she is here but not... Even when she is here, one of them is here with her, so we all hang out alot...  Mike and I just have the freedom of empty nesters...  We are still watching our baby grow into a woman..  She graduate HS this year, alot of changes are coming!!

First things First..

I am a 40 year old woman, I live in (what used to be a small town) NW FL..  I live about 30 minutes from the Gulf of Mexico, we absolutely surrounded with water...  I can be at the water 10 Minutes in any direction, it is fabulous!!!  I have lived here most of my life and I am just now at 40 really embracing my choice of home town...  I have lived here always because I was expected too, and because I am not very social, so I have alot of friends, but if you ask them, it is because they talked to me first, or because we happened into a conversation because of circumstances, not because I walked up and made friends..  I am just not that girl!!!  Once we are friends, no sweat, I am great in that scenario...